Thirst traps and tooth gaps 

Picture it, darling. April 26th, 2017. Our sweet baby Blake is out here living his best mid-level retail fantasy—foldin’ shirts, clockin’ hours, and scrollin’ Grindr like it’s a spiritual practice. He’s knee-deep in abs, blank bios, and unsolicited torso shots when—HALLELU—a miracle appears.

 

Fair skin. Dark features. Eyes like a galaxy, so deep you could suffocate in ’em. And the final blow? A tooth gap. Not just any gap, darling—a sexy, “this-coffee’s-on-me” kind of gap. Blake gasped. Blake clutched. Blake SLID into those DMs faster than a wig reveal in a thunderstorm.

 

Now Tyler, bless his suspicious heart, takes one look and thinks, “Oh great. Another Grindr clown with a line and a lactose issue.” But baby, this wasn’t just some thirsty scroll-by. Blake had charm. Blake had flair. Blake had the nerve to open with a compliment.

 

One flirty back-and-forth later, the tea is spilled: Tyler is a barista. Not just any barista. The barista at the coffee shop right outside Blake’s job. I mean… come on. At this point, even the universe is like, “Girl, this is the plot.”

 

So what does Blake do? He puts on his big gay boots and asks Tyler out. On a coffee date. His first ever with a man. The audacity! The bravery! The lactose! And guess what? Tyler says yes. Mic drop.

 

Next day, the lovebirds meet at a place called Crazy Kebab—because nothing screams romance like caffeine and questionable garlic sauce. Blake, still new to the coffee game, orders what can only be described as a dessert in a mug: hazelnut mocha, two sugars, lactose-free milk. He turns around fully expecting judgment.

 

But baby, Tyler? He smiles. That smile. The one that said, “You’re weird. I’m into it.”

 

Three coffees, too many cigarettes, and one lingering hug later, Blake starts to walk back to work, heart pounding like a Charli XCX remix. He barely makes it up the steps before—ding!—a message from Tyler:

“When can we have our second date?”

 

And from that moment on…

Two queens. One Grindr scroll. A love story brewed strong—and served hot.